Do We Ever Heal From It?
It is quite confronting to face any trauma let alone childhood trauma. I have been on this journey myself for a number of years.
For some of us, healing our childhood trauma, or any trauma, lingers around our body heart, and soul like a grapevine in an orchid. Flowering in spring and summer, while remaining dormant during the cooler months. Similar to us as humans. Sometimes we flourish, other times in deep hibernation.
Right now, as the collective consciousness quickly awakens, more and more souls wake up from the slumber of the matrix.
More and more of us are having to face their hidden pain, trauma, and emotional rainfall that can almost drown us. Later surfacing as rage, anxiety, hopelessness, self-sabotage, and self-destruction - all of which I know too well.
As I make attempts to break free, that vine around me lets me know it's not ready to let go and fall away.
I will happily guide other souls in helping transcend their trauma in my holistic practice. I help re-balance and clear their auras, cellular structures, energy systems, and chakras. I can even travel with them and repair parts of their soul memory from previous lives.
Personally in my own life, I struggle in facing my own depths of trauma.
Like they say it’s easier to help others than to help yourself. Putting others before you or distracting yourself from the real truth that we don’t want to face and admit.
That is, we are all in deep, deep pain.
We all understand Empathy, and some of us are more of an Empath or Highly Sensitive Person. Whether you care to admit it or not, we are all collectively in pain. Maybe not on the surface level, but we do feel others' pain with the current situations in the world.
Many circumstances can make us feel trapped. There is no escape, it is all around us.
When we bypass the trauma from childhood /teenage years and grow into adults, with no fault of our own. This is how we have evolved. Our wounds and our unreleased emotions grow that emotional vine. Longer and longer it gets. We can prune this vine by working through the trauma on our own or with help to become stronger and healthier soul beings.
Add trauma to our already complex lives, jobs, mortgages, and dependants. My limited beliefs feeds self-doubt, anxiety, and depression. Carrying a heavy weight on our shoulders and heaviness in our hearts and souls. We may have the idea, that life never works out the way we had hoped.
My childhood trauma, fertalisers my fears and insecurities, ego turning into Jackle-and-Hyde. I live in a world of seeking self-perfectionism, and high standards. Feeling too much, or nothing at all. Decision-making, swings back and forth resulting in indecision and staying frozen. I struggle to ask for help and my inability to think /know /believe I am good enough. Feeling lost with no direction, on many occasions.
Has my childhood trauma of pushing everything under the rug and moving on as if nothing has happened left me with no ability to heal my self?
The pushing feelings down and pushing people away still happens at times. But I do know that I am one of the very few people in my family that is working through trauma by distancing myself, only for it to be seen by others as ignoring them and being hurtful.
How Do We Break Free?
Unless you are ready to depart and have fulfilled your soul contract here on Earth and onto your next journey, you keep going. I have learned we can not be responsible for healing anyone else in our family except us.
It is not about forcing others to heal themselves. Everyone is accountable for their own life. Choose to heal by example, showing others it is possible to undo what may have been done in the past. It can be a lonely road as it takes a level of awareness and courage of self, that unless you retreat to focus on your own growth and for your highest good it may appear as selfish. It is not because there is an ulterior motive. Even though that how others in your family may assume or perceive it to be.
What Can We Do?
I don’t have all the answers. How the healing will be, is depending on the level of trauma you have experienced. How long it takes is also unknown.
It does help to cry and release emotions. Journal or something creative helps channel the old energy out of the body. For others its a more active release or with a licenced counsellor or therapist.
Acknowledge and congratulate yourself on how strong you are. You have decided to start the healing process. And you are probably doing much better than you think.
Be at peace knowing that we can not undo all the trauma at once and it may take many attempts to heal our childhood.
Dont stop living your life. Healing is a piece of the puzzle of who you are. Some parts will fall into place and others pieces may need a bit more jiggling. The end result will be all pieces coming together.
Be brave beloved souls, Be Brave.